Now, here's a scary tale.

It's not even Halloween yet, but...

With a little over two months remaining in the calendar I've already posted more than any other year. I also realize much of what I posted has been of a negative nature...Sorry.

Really, I'm an easy going guy who tries to enjoy life, but if you're in the lawn care industry you must admit, this year, more than any other in recent memory has had its trials and tribulations.

The truth is, the products that were unceremoniously dumped to the curb back on Earth Day 2009 were all approved by Health Canada and the PMRA. Why you ask? Because those products went through rigorous testing and approval before being deemed safe for public use. That's why they were assigned PCP numbers in the first place.

So why the 180?

Really doesn't matter the horse is gone, you can close the barn doors if you want. It won't make a difference, especially with McGuinty tending the farm.

I, like you, was brainwashed into thinking this was all for the greater good until I learned it affected an industry responsible for approximately 4% of all pesticides used. That the golf courses and the food we eat were still susceptible to the old school treatments. Read some of my earlier posts and you'll see this to be true, but now...I'm just angry and burnt out.

This year we were really shown the results of not having the proper tools to deal with infestations. With very little left to fight Chinch Bug they thrived in the heat and destroyed many a lawn this summer...ask any company out there.

It seemed that alergies were much worse this year than they've ever been and if you could monitor it, you'd probably find more children are suffering the ill effects of playing on, playgrounds, parks and lawns that are bare,insect-infested, hard as concrete, or pollen farms over-run with thistles, burdock, and various broadleaf than prior to the bylaw when the surface was padded with green grass.

The natural predators like birds and bats were down which left raccoons and skunks digging the hell out of the turf for...insert your grub name here.

You can argue nematodes all you want as an effective control but the fact remains, there are a lot of variables involved in this application: Expiration date, must be kept refrigerated until use, 2 hours to use the concentrate once mixed, must be watered into the lawn for 3 days, must be applied in cloud, rain or late in the day. Plus Sod webworm, white grub and letherjackets all require a different strain of nematode for full effect.

I tell you, I feel more like a circus sideshow juggler than a lawn guy with the amount of multitasking and split decisions I have to make.

Now I'm hearing that the the Ministry of the Environment and the powers that be are starting to get tougher with the 250 golf courses in Ontario. Apparently they've been abusing their right to still use pesticides by applying more than is necessary. But golf is big money and for now, they just pay the fines and do what ever they please.

Perhaps the politicians and big business need to find their fairways infested with one problem, or another so they can rethink this whole issue?...then again no. It's hard for for elected officials to admit they made a mistake...gas-fired power plant in Mississauga anyone?

Yet one day, the golf industry might find itself in the same position many lawn care companies deal with daily- trying to hit the hole from a sand trap. Fore!

To all my golfing friends, if this happens: Say goodbye to absolutes and hello to what ifs and maybes because they're coming for you next buddy. Good luck. You're going to need it.

Hearing no, seeing no, speaking no evil still makes it evil none-the-less.

As the crane flies, or the chinch that stole business

As you can see I was a little torn between the best title to represent this year in lawn care, not just for me, but for everyone in the industry.

Surely the Apocalypse must be coming as we saw every infestation except locusts. With the drought in July how could we not?

I can't recall a year this bad for all manner of pests, Chinch Bug, Sod Webworm, Japanese Beetle, and now Crane Flies. You name it, I could point out damage somewhere. If you think,"well, it's just one of those years", think again especially next Spring when the Leatherjackets start feeding on your lawn courtesy of all the Crane Fly activity you are now seeing.

With few products available to treat this relentless attack, I'm finding more and more people I talk to, are bringing back a little something-something from state-side to try and save their property and maintain their curb appeal--- Carbaryl, 2-4-D, Mecaprop, Dicamba; garden centres south of the border must think they've died and gone to God's green acre.

Now, it's not that these people are criminal and thrive on administering forbidden chemical treatments to their turf--- quite the contrary. They are law-abiding citizens, who pay their taxes and are doing their best to get by. They are simply fed up with the decisions made for them by a chosen few to appease a chosen few and after all they are aware that it's not illegal to have the good stuff, just to use it.

Honestly, putting the products back in the hands of the professionals at least, to me, makes sense and those who choose to treat their lawns could do so properly without injury to turf, or environment. They could make sure the applicators are licenced and regulated, not some student who could give a rat's ass about what he's applying to your lawn. I think this is fair.

Hey, this is just my opinion. I will abide by whatever law is set down...I couldn't afford the fine anyway.

But I'm concerned with the underground applications which now seem rampant, eventually more harm than good might come from the pesticide prohibition. I mean there are some still applying left over Diazanon, a pesticide that affects the nervous system.

Do you really want your neighbour applying this product to their lawn because they can't buy a reasonable alternative?

Yet, there is a provincial election coming up in October, so take a good long look at your lawn, at your neighbours lawn, at the lawns in your community and remember when you fill out your ballot who put these wheels in motion in the first place.

Normally I'd say this is none of my business, but it is my business- one which I want to keep and continue to the best of my ability. As it stands now, that is becoming extremely difficult to do.

Politicians will always be politicians, but you still have the power to send a message.

Make it loud and clear.

See spot run

Hopefully with this weather we've been having you've still been watering the lawn- one deep watering a week is sufficient, or about 1" worth.

And I trust everyone has their mowing height at the highest possible setting if you're even cutting it at all? Three inches will keep your lawn drought tolerant and able to survive the dormancy that comes with the Summer heat and lack of rain.

If you haven't been doing this then you probably have seen the crabgrass encroaching, yet again, from the pavement and lawn edges where it oh-so loves the heat.

The bad news is there is nothing that can be done to control it at this time of the year. Dimension and Acclaim are no longer options and Corn Gluten?...well, you're asking a lot from an organic control in these conditions...so you have crabgrass.

The good news is, crabgrass has a shallow root system, so it's easy to pull up when on the perimeter. However don't let it get to the point of germination, otherwise next year the problem could be a whole lot worse.

The next problem in the heat is Chinch Bug- a top feeding insect that sucks the juice out of your grass rendering it lifeless.

Chinch also love drought and can take out a lawn pretty quick if not dealt with. If you want to know whether you have Chinch, locate a patch of lawn where it is stressed, preferably before 10 AM, and use your fingers to rub the grass vigorously. Then peel back the grass blades to the soil and look if you can see either the nymphs, (black with red on their backs), or the adults, (black with white on their wings).

Ways to combat this insect are to keep the lawn watered and the thatch layer to a minimum (aerate/ rake). I would have said Neem Oil but....oh yeah that organic has now been banned by the PMRA.

Now are you ready for the catch 22 of this whole situation?

So you've been watering regularly, the grass is a decent length, there's no sign of Chinch and the crabgrass is minimal or non existent. You're pretty pleased with your effort until you see signs of Grub damage- a circular brown patch in the middle of the lawn that isn't responding to water and seems to come up like a carpet because the root system is gone.

The beetles have to lay their eggs somewhere and they'll have better success in a nice juicy lawn like yours over one that is burnt to a crisp, dry and hard like concrete.

Unfortunately the only options here are to watch your lawn disappear to an all you can eat grub Thanksgiving, or apply nematodes.

However, know this; the earliest an application can be done is mid August, it has to be performed in rainy/cloudy conditions, or at dusk because UV will kill the microscopic nematodes.

Oh, and you must, must, must water for three days following the application to effectively flush your nematodes into the root zone.

If you're going to do it yourself, be aware of expiration dates and the nematodes must remain refrigerated until use...man, no wonder people tell me they don't work.

Do all this and grubs shouldn't be a problem and you won't have raccoons and skunks digging the hell out of your lawn either.

Yet, there is one way to help combat all this, but it will take time. Over seed every fall with an endophytic grass seed, preferably one that will establish a deep root system and is drought tolerant like Eco Lawn.

Even with all this there are no guarantees anymore. All it takes is one misstep and with Mother Nature tripping horribly over the last two years we might as well turn to Lady Luck after all it couldn't get any worse....right?

Say goodbye to it.

Are you kidding me? Neem oil has been banned?

Am I to believe now I can't even use organic products to keep a lawn healthy?

Wow! What a bunch of idiots!

But where to lay the imbecilic blame?

Could it be those lawn companies that were actually foolish enough to tout Neem oil as a Chinch Bug control in their promotional materials, when they knew it was not registered in Canada as anything but a foliage sheen?

Could it be some of the distributors who saw profits rise when the pesticide ban came in? Psst we have something for Chinch Bug. Meet me in the ally in five minutes.

Could it be the PMRA who wouldn't recognize this ORGANIC product for anything else than making your plants sparkle?

They're all to blame in my books.

Not once was I ever stupid enough to promote Neem for Chinch. Sure, I used it in my applications and labeled it as a foliage sheen to my customers. I knew I couldn't legally say it was an effective Chinch deterrent. Hell, I didn't even list it as a possible control when discussing Chinch on my website.

Yet, here we are and Neem is now off the table as an application....man, someone in the government sure has a hard-on for the lawn care industry.

Why don't you dudes just show up at my house and put a bullet in my brain. It would be preferable to this slow death you're currently putting me through.

And mark my words, Fiesta will suffer the same fate one day. After all, it's an organic control too. When I see what the liquid iron is doing to my equipment, I wonder about all those companies out there applying blanket applications and the amount of product leaching into the ground. At least, for the most part I only do spot applications.

I can't help but think about a story I heard once concerning going green by getting more electric cars on the road. Then someone realized that all those electric batteries have to be replaced and discarded from time to time. Suddenly the idea didn't seem so green after all.

And this is no different. Every time there's one solution two new problems crop up in its place.

Just telling it like it is...because really, what else do I have left to lose...fertilizer?

Maybe I'm getting my panties in a knot over nothing? There will be another product to replace Neem down the line, but what about now...in this heat...on lawns that are already drought stressed?

Sure you can water because the Chinch don't like well maintained lawns, but the municipalities want you to conserve the precious liquid.

Sure you can aerate to break up the thatch layer, but I'd rather run my machine over concrete than compacted, drought-stressed clay.

Sure you can over-seed with an endophyte enhanced grass seed like Eco-Lawn, but you'd have better results finding a brothel in the Vatican then getting seeds to germinate in this heat.


Get ready to raise the rent people, because the Chinch bugs are moving in.

The buffet just opened and it's on your lawn.

Bite the hand that feeds

Last week I finished up the final Summer applications and was appalled to see the crabgrass starting on many of the lawns.

OK, crabgrass loves the heat and you usually see it at this time of the year, especially under these toasty conditions. The problem for me is, since crabgrass was also rampant last year I added pre-emergent treatments to all the programs this year in an attempt to avoid the same situation.

However, since the only tool I have to treat it is Corn Gluten, (an organic that is very hit and miss), I seemed to have dumped a ton of money into a product that doesn't work very well.

I did two separate applications; some got granular and some got liquid to the same result.

I'm sure my supplier will tell me that the product was not applied at the recommended rate and that's why it didn't work.

I can assure you, since I don't employee students and did many of the applications myself, it was correctly applied.

What we have is simply a product that doesn't work very well, yet costs twice as much and someone is making a lot of money off my back and your wallet.

But who has to field the complaints?....Moi!

It's the same deal I have with Fiesta, sometimes it works well and others I don't even want to talk about it (just look at your clover and chickweed this year and tell me what's wrong with this picture). Bad enough that the customer's confidence is already on the edge with this product because of Weed-B-Gone- a dumbed-down version of what I use. Thanks very much Scotts. I'll bet you're not hurting for money?

With grub season about to start I'm faced with the same issue in nematodes. Last year- one of the worst in some time- I did every single application myself. They were done in cloudy, or rainy conditions, they were watered in properly yet some of my customers still had grub problems come Spring. Thank you very much Environmental Factor. No wonder all the Dragons Den bought into your product....ka-ching!

Oh by the way that spray tank I bought back in the Spring is leaking somewhere else now. Thank you very much Rittenhouse.

Funny thing, I have a spray tank on one of my trucks that I paid $400 for, is God only knows how old and works without fail.

You'd think in the technological age we live in, someone would be able to deliver a better mouse trap, but not so. Products are not as good because there's no money to be made in stuff that lasts.

Before the pesticide ban, I used Dimension and no one had crabgrass and if they did I used Acclaim and wiped it out.

Before the pesticide ban, I used Merit and no one had grubs.

Before the pesticide ban, I used Par III and no one had weeds.

The customer was happy, I was happy. Now if you want to see what your lawn used to look like you have to play golf.

In fact, the only product that hasn't let me down is Eco-Lawn the low maintenance grass seed. Thank you very much Wildflower Farm, you guys still rock!

I guess it's evident that I'm pissed, but if you don't want to get called out as a company with inferior products then give me better stuff so I can do my job and keep my customers content at least. I'll happily pay for things that work properly, but when they don't, I feel it's my duty to inform others...and if you've read this you can consider yourself informed.

If it quacks like a duck

Breaking news: Pesticide ban lifted!

Oh, how I wish it were April 1st so this would actually make sense.

Seems the largest lawn care company is up to their old tricks again. The latest, in order to woo more customers, they are actually saying, "the Provincial Government has lifted the ban on pesticides for the control of weeds again."

NOT TRUE!

Neither is the fact you have to take an entire program to get weed control (Fiesta), or your socks periodically escape from your dryer in an effort to challenge your pairing skills. You see, there's just not a lot of money to be made if they give you a one-off weed spray and these companies know that, hence the lies.

The problem is, there will always be people out there who are so fed up with the way their lawns look, they will want to believe and be drawn into this vortex of untruths.

Remember you can't spell "believe" with out the "lie".

Oh, how I wish I could write posts on lawn care instead of this dribble.

On Wednesday of last week I had the Ministry of the Environment here to inspect my premises- which I passed without any problem. When I asked them about some of the statements others have been making they told me, they have no jurisdiction and a company is allowed to market their programs and products in anyway they see fit- fibs included. That's why we have the Better Business Bureau, the Complaints Board and sites like Homestars, they told me, so the home owner, once duped and parted from their money have a forum from which to warn others.

However, not everyone has access to these tools, or thinks of researching the free-fall before they leap. So much for those poor sods I guess.

Yet the Ministry seemed less concerned with these developments and more intent on running scenarios by me like, if I spilled Fiesta and a duck swam by, drank it and got sick, what would I do....?

Really?

What do they think, I'm out there every morning dumping $180 bottles of concentrated Fiesta into the drain like ketchup on fries?

Isn't the Ministry of the Environment there to protect us from ourselves? Enforce the bylaws? Safe guard the environment?

If some companies are out there spreading propaganda that pesticides are back on the table for public consumption, isn't that a mixed message?

What we need is a consumer watchdog in place to not only protect, but call these companies on their misinformation. Educate the customer for godsake! Not someone more concerned about the possible upset stomach of aquatic water fowl.

The representative from the Ministry wouldn't even refer to Fiesta by name and kept calling it a pesticide as if to reinforce that her job had not become obsolete.

And perhaps she's right? I mean four years from now when they realize we've put a hell of a lot of iron into the soil the song and dance routine may change. Fiesta might even become the next outlaw with a picture at your local post office.

Seems the Ministry still likes to think they have teeth but when it comes to those operating a lawn care business they only bite down with toothless gums.

I guess the 2 bills I fork over every season for my operating license is just a cash grab too?

Forget the duck. You don't think I get an upset stomach from swallowing that every year?

Oh how I wish I had picked a different business to go into.

...Pants on fire

It truly is alarming to consider that very few in the lawn care industry seem to care about the customer anymore once the cheque is signed, or the Visa is swiped.

Sure, you can eventually get someone on the phone if you're mad as hell about something, but why get your customer to the brink in the first place?

Here are some lessons in the glowing examples of blatant lying in order to get the money and run.

Now take into consideration a few of these come through the words of others and are classified as here-say, yet you should know what is apparently going on out there.

Lesson #1: I find it troubling to see the ads on a few garden centres' readerboards touting the use of nematodes to get rid of your grubs. Yes nematodes do work provided they are applied in the right conditions, after being stored in the right conditions, with the faith that these microscopic worms are even in the package in the first place instead of baggy of vermiculite, or a sponge with a brown blob on it.

However, selling them at the end of May....really?

I guess they are counting on the average customer to be dumber than a sack of hammers and desperate to try anything.

I've even heard of a few retailers who don't even bother to refrigerate the little buggers.

Good luck getting those dead nematodes to work.

Yet, even the manufacturer, who is making money hand-over-fist, is stocking the shelves while they know the more effective time to apply is in mid August.

Oh well....they can sell them to you again in the summer.

Man, no wonder I have so many people telling me nematodes don't work.


Lesson #2: There are a few companies out there, that I covered in a previous post, who seem to have lying to customers as part of their mission statement, all in an effort to expand the coffers with the almighty buck.

It has been everything, from erroneous information about the current weed killer of choice, Fiesta, to the constant upsell of products your lawn probably doesn't need, to -egad!- faking your confirmation of service and billing you for unwanted applications.

And if you're OK with all that then I have some swamp land in Florida you might be interested in.


Lesson #3: This one comes from personal experience so I have no problem dropping the name of the company- Rittenhouse.

This year I spent over 4G's on a new spray tank for one of our trucks only to have it leak Fiesta all over the back of the flatbed in only the second day of use. On the third day the spray gun fell apart because they decided using a plastic connector between the gun and the hose would be more efficient than spending $3.00 more to put a brass one in.

Hey don't believe me....check out the pics.




All this in the middle of the busiest part of the season.

Now, they did send me a replacement piece for the tank and why not? A plumber friend of mine told me they had attached it too tight in the first place and cracked it.

But the spray gun? I was told the tank and gun are not suitable for organic products like Liquid Corn Gluten and Fiesta.

Hello! You do know there's a Provincial bylaw now? Have you even heard of the PMRA...Ministry of the Environment....are you even listening?

I have another used tank that I bought for $400, 3 years ago and other than replacing the odd hose, it has given me no trouble at all spraying organics.

So you can understand why I am royally pissed.

I guess no one ever told these idiots that happy customers are repeat customers and they'll just soldier on with their P.T. Barnum way of thinking and caveat emptor.

*clapping* Way to screw yourself out of the potentially thousands of future dollars I could have spent with your company...was it really worth it?

This is one former customer who has no problem posting his displeasure with extreme prejudice to a world wide audience.

Here ends the lesson.